An 'everyman' toting heavy artillery
By Paul Clinton
CNN Reviewer
(CNN) -- The latest Arnold Schwarzenegger film, "Collateral Damage," received millions of dollars in free publicity when its release was postponed after the September 11 terrorist attacks -- an ironic happenstance which undoubtedly will heighten the curiosity surrounding this film.
After all, at a time when many Americans want revenge against the elusive Osama bin Laden, it can be appealing to watch Schwarzenegger track down the bad guy, beat him to a pulp, kill him (or her) at least three times, and then, in an orgasmic wave of "and justice for all," we get to slam our buttered-popcorn-encrusted hands together and cheer as the credits roll.
There's just one itty-bitty little problem. The movie stinks.
Lately, Schwarzenegger has gotten it into his head that he can play an "everyman" on screen. That thespian archetype was created by the likes of Henry Fonda and Jimmy Stewart, and now owned by actors such as Tom Hanks and Billy Bob Thornton.
Arnold is many things: a movie star, a bodybuilding icon, a rich and powerful role model for millions. But he's not a skilled, subtle actor, and in order to pull off being an everyman, you've got to know how to act. Not only can Arnold not act, but he's also having trouble carrying films. His last two -- "End of Days" (1999) and "The 6th Day" (2000) -- tanked at the box office with Arnold trying to be a more or less regular guy.
Horrific comparisons
Without September 11, "Collateral Damage" would have been just another bad movie. Now it's a bad, embarrassing movie.
Fairly or unfairly, the similarities between celluloid and real life have brought the inevitable comparisons. The fact is that "Collateral Damage" is painfully, wantonly and hauntingly horrific from beginning to end. And its inevitable association with a truly painful, haunting and horrific event only amplifies that.
Schwarzenegger plays Gordy Brewer, a Los Angeles fireman with a loving wife and adoring son. In a flash, a terrorist bomb kills his family, and Gordy goes on a rampage of revenge. A Colombian terrorist, "El Lobo" (The Wolf), played by Cliff Curtis, is on a bloody mission to bring his country's war against drug lords to the United States, an action he hopes will force the U.S. military out of his country. To El Lobo, the fact that his campaign kills Brewer's family is merely a by-product of war -- collateral damage.
Gordy's first obstacle in tracking down El Lobo is an indifference he encounters on the part of the United States government.
His second hindrance is agent Brandt (Elias Koteas) of the CIA. In the cliche-riddled script by David and Peter Griffiths, it's never clear just whose side the CIA is on (another pre-September 11 cliche), as Brandt and his boys go hither and yon shooting at terrorists, drug lords, innocent villagers -- even at Brewer.
That's only the beginning of the film's absurdities. Brewer somehow gets into the Colombian warlords' secret camp despite the fact that he speaks no Spanish. He also single-handedly blows up a cocaine factory the feds have never been able to find.
You get the idea.
Awful script
Andrew Davis is a good director, when given talent and material with which to work. A case in point is his wonderfully intelligent thriller "The Fugitive" (1993), starring Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones.
But Davis didn't have a chance in hell with this sappy, prefabricated, paint-by-numbers script, which is tailored to the strengths and weaknesses of its superstar and not toward any kind of coherent dramatic goal.
Small blessings come from John Leguizamo as Felix, the cocaine maker, and John Turturro, playing Armstrong, a Canadian mechanic who works for the cartel. Whenever either actor is on screen with Schwarzenegger, the film almost comes to life. The operative word here, however, is "almost."
The beautiful Italian actress Francesca Neri plays Selena, the mysterious woman Brewer rescues from the cartel. American audiences may not be familiar with Neri; her only previous English-language film is "Hannibal," the 2001 sequel to "The Silence of the Lambs" (1991). After "Collateral Damage," her profile figures to be even smaller. Her American discovery will have to wait for another film.
"Collateral Damage" was first scheduled to be released last July, then moved out of the summer slot and slated to be buried in October, when no one would notice it among all the fall Oscar wannabes. Then, after September 11, it gained undue attention, was moved yet again, and is now opening to much fanfare.
But it's still the same movie -- a bad movie.
"Collateral Damage" opens nationwide on Friday, and is rated R.
